Power cuts to turn Kashmiris into mathematical wizards: Govt

Srinagar: Long, random and frequent power cuts in Kashmir Valley have the potential of turning ordinary Kashmiris into mathematical wizards, the J&K government asserted today. The power cuts are regulated by a complex set of algorithms, officials said, and breaking these algorithms to predict the next power puzzle required enhanced math skills. “We are utilsing  complex software and algorithm to determine when power to certain
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Flattery, sycophancy allowed: JK govt clarifies on social media gag

Srinagar: Amid criticism over its social media gag for employees, the J&K government today clarified that the gag was not applicable to flattery and sycophancy of the government. All posts falling under the “chaploos” category are not only welcome, they would be appreciated, officials said here. The tweaked rules were published on the GAD website
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NC seeks identity of the dog Tasaduq swore by

Srinagar: Opposition National Conference is asking the ruling Peoples Democratic Party to make the identity of the dog who its new minister swore by, public. Chief Minister Mehbooba Mufti’s brother Tasaduq Mufti took his oath as a minister in the name of dog (dog god) this week. The National Conference today said that it always
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JK links employee salaries with Facebook inactivity

New candidates to produce social media non-involvement certificates  Srinagar: The J&K government has decided to link the salaries of its employees with their social media “inactivity” to strengthen its new social media policy. Employees will now have to get a No Objection Certificate from respective disbursing officers about their Facebook and Twitter activity before their
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Kya apke toothpaste mein namak hain: TV reporter had asked Yasin Malik

The India Today TV reporter heckled by Yasin Malik today clarified that all she had been asking Malik was, ‘Kya aapke toothpaste mein namak hai’. Kamaljit Sandu’s clarification gives a new twist to the mystery ‘why Yasin Malik heckled the TV journalist’ which became the second most asked question this week on Google India after
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South Asia

Vijay Mallya denies running away with Modi’s achhe din

Liqour baron and Member of Parliament Vijay Mallya today denied allegations that he had run away with Modi’s promised achhe din (good days). The self claimed king of good times, who has apparently fallen on bad times, told Dapaan in an exclusive interview from an undisclosed location that he had no interest in immaterial things
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India launches vaccination drive to combat anti-nationalism

New Delhi: Indian Health Ministry is launching a nation-wide vaccination drive to combat growing anti-nationalism in the country. The drive comes after a breakthrough by Indian scientists led by Baba Ramdev, who developed the ‘Rashtravadi’ vaccine from special antigens found in gomutra or cow urine. The vaccine manufactured by Ramdev’s Patanjali Ayurved under the much hyped flagship
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Nirma ties up with Khyber for asli doodh si safedi

Srinagar: Ahmedabad based detergent maker Nirma group has tied up with Kashmir’s Khyber group to give a new lease of life to its products known once for “doodh si safedi”. The two companies are joining hands to produce a new line of detergents to be known as Khyber-Nirma detergents. Of late Khyber has been in limelight
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Self Reliance: Traffic police to finance JK budget

Srinagar: Jammu and Kashmir is heading towards much coveted financial self reliance with the help of its traffic police, which has extracted enough revenues through fines to finance 70 percent of the state’s annual budget, Finance Minister Haseeb Drabu disclosed here today. Flanked by the Inspector General of Police Traffic  Viplav Kumar at a press conference
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By asking us to teach, Govt playing with future of students: Teacher’s Forum

Srinagar: The Jammu and Kashmir Teachers Forum President Abdul Qayoom Wani today lashed out at the government for forcing union leaders to teach students. Wani said the government was playing with the future of students by asking teacher’s union leaders like him to teach. “We haven’t taken classes in decades, How and what are we
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Police in fix as Zaroo renames Masarat Alam to Khurshid Alam

Srinagar: Prominent name changer Fayaz Ahmad Zaroo has put police and intelligence agencies in a fix by changing the name of separatist leader Masarat Alam to Khurshid Alam. Zaroo announced the name change of the recently released separatist through an Urdu advertisement in a Srinagar based leading English daily. “This nation is thankful to His
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Art & Culture

Padma awardees getting second hand medals, move court

In a major embarrassment to the government,  the recently announced Padma awardees led by full time actor Anupam Kher have approached Supreme Court seeking directions to restrain the government from handing over to them, what they described as, the “second hand” awards. The awardees in their petition to apex court stated that they feared government
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Drabu to don Ladishah costume to lend human touch to budget

Jammu: The PDP-BJP coalition government’s first budget is all set for a human touch with the finance minister Haseeb Drabu, who also heads the culture ministry, wearing a Ladishah costume during presentation. Ladishah is a traditional folk satire artist in Kashmiri culture. Finance ministry officials have roped in noted theatre director M K Raina to
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